I got this in the email a while ago and looking at it again, I had to post it because it is too funny.
Pessimist: “The glass is half empty.”
Optimist: “The glass is half full.”
Database Administrator: “The glass is sized correctly for peak loads.”
Virtualization Admin: “This person should be sharing a Dixie Cup with the guys in accounting.”
Business Intelligence Admin: “How can we upsell this customer to bottled water?”
Security Admin: “Whose glass is this? Half of the water has gone missing.”
Storage Admin: “This glass needs thin provisioning.”
ETL Admin: “We need a faster way to fill this glass.”
Active Directory Admin: “We need a secondary glass for redundancy.”
Backup Admin: “Nobody told me to take a snapshot of the full glass.”
Break Fix Admin: “Hang on, I’ll go get you another glass.”
Linux Admin: “I bet I could build a better glass myself.”
Project Manager: “I need a FTE for 15 minutes to accomplish the deliverable of a full glass.”
Azure Developer: “Why buy your own glass? The clouds are full of water.”
jQuery Developer: “When you start drinking, it automatically refills.”
Mac User: “Check out how much thinner and smaller my glass is, and it holds that much water too.”
Twitter: “The faucet is over capacity. Please wait a moment and try again.”